He’s the greeter of all guests. He can schmooze the cookie out of your hand in the blink of an eye. And he’s the undisputed King of the Office. He knows it, makes sure you know it, and wears his power well.

He works the cute puppy eyes and happy-to-see-you snuggles like the pro he is and he works the snack and lunch circuit with the precision of a stopwatch. He starts his days with a Starbucks Puppacino (and yes, they know his order upon sight!) and then begins the patrol for snacks as he makes mid-morning office rounds. A morning nap and he’s geared up for the more substantial payoffs of lunchtime rounds. “He knows what time every one of us has lunch and works it like nothing I’ve ever seen,” commented one team member who requested anonymity out of concern for “Pookey Payback.”

Pookey faithfully attends all staff meetings, casts tie-breaking votes when necessary, and fancies himself as a rescue who’s ‘done well’ for himself. Though the specifics of his contract remains mostly confidential, a monthly in-office spa day appears to be one of his negotiated perks as he remains the only staffer with his own personal groomer.

​